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DON'T MESS WITH GRANDMA Starring: Michael Jai White, Jackie Richardson, Billy Zane, Miles Faber, Ess Hodlmoser, Rebecca Auerbach, Evan Stern, Emily Alatalo, and Brandon Knox Director: Jason Krawczyk This film has been reviewed by Paige, Nick, and Quentin as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2024 Fantastic Film Festival. QUENTIN As a huge fan of Michael Jai White’s Black Dynamite , as well as a somewhat ironic fan of Billy Zane, I went into Don’t Mess with Grandma hoping for a tongue-in-cheek, B-movie takedown of home invasion movies, which has become a pretty stale genre. To its credit, Grandma is exactly that; however, it’s almost too B-movie. Aside from a completely game White and Zane, the rest of the performances are rough, and the low-budget trappings and cheap veneer consistently pulled me out of the film. I didn’t hate it — in fact, I’d love to see it remade with a bigger budget — but Black Dynamite , it ain’t. NICK Every movie serves a purpose. Some are awards contenders, some VFX marvels, and some are just there to turn your mind off and have fun. Don't Mess with Grandma (aka Sunset Superman ) is just mindless dumb fun. Michael Jai White (a real life badass) gets to play a different type of tough guy, and it's a role that suits him well. There’s some rough dialogue in the early going, but as we move away from conversation and into the ridiculous mayhem, the film finds its sweet spot. It’s goofy, sure, but it kept me entertained throughout. PAIGE Unfortunately, Don’t Mess With Grandma ’s only redeeming quality is Michael Jai White’s rugged charisma. Though some may find this low-budget home invasion flick to be a comedic gem, I found it to be too ridiculously corny for its own good. The editing is jagged, and the majority of the action sequences are rough to watch. Ultimately, the film lacks the balance necessary to impress me because it mostly relies on a particular brand of humor. It’s one of those dumb albeit fun slapstick movies I’d recommend throwing on in the background when you’re doing other things.

MURDER MYSTERY 2 Starring: Adam Sandler, Jennifer Aniston, Mark Strong, Mélanie Laurent, Jodie Turner-Smith, Zurin Villanueva, Enrique Arce, Adeel Akhtar, Kuhoo Verma, John Kani, and Dany Boon Director: Jeremy Garelick NICK Comedy-wise, the Adam Sandler/Netflix experiment has not garnered very good results. In saying that, 2019's Murder Mystery (an average comedy in and of itself) is likely the best of that crop so far. So, even though it didn’t really need a sequel, Murder Mystery 2 is here, and it's basically a notch worse in every way. The comedy is a little more "miss," the supporting cast is a little less interesting, and the twists are a little more telegraphed. It’s a franchise that need not continue, and it’s time to see Sandler continue full steam ahead with his dramatic roles and Oscar push. QUENTIN Murder Mystery 2 isn’t a sequel that needs to exist, nor is it good enough to justify its own existence. Still, even as you acknowledge that it’s just an algorithm-driven money grab that granted Adam Sandler a paid vacation to an exotic locale, there is something inherently watchable about The Sandman. Despite hit and (mostly) miss jokes and pedestrian action sequences, there is just enough charm to keep it from being a total waste of time. The 80-minute runtime doesn’t hurt either. It’s not exactly “good,” per se, but it’s better than some other Netflix Originals (looking at you, The Man from Toronto ). JOSEPH Murder Mystery 2 in no way revitalizes the Happy Madison brand, nor does it deviate from Adam Sandler’s typical fare. That being said, it is a film that is fun enough to be entertaining. The jokes are mostly duds, unable to elicit even a chuckle, but there are several clever visual gags worth a laugh. As for the actual mystery, it's fun trying to figure out who the guilty party is, and it’s crafted well enough that I expect many to be bamboozled. All in all, Murder Mystery 2 is the type of film you watch while doing chores.

ROLE PLAY Starring: Kaley Cuoco, David Oyelowo, Connie Nielsen, Rudi Dharmalingam, Simon Delaney, and Bill Nighy Director: Thomas Vincent QUENTIN Prime’s Role Play is exactly what you would expect from a gender-swapped True Lies -ripoff that is quietly dropping on a streaming service in January. Despite being rated R, it’s surprisingly timid, and although it’s billed as an action-comedy-thriller, there is very little action, very few jokes, and almost zero thrills. David Oyelowo does his best to elevate the material, especially on the comedy front, but it’s almost as if director Thomas Vincent held him back so he wouldn’t steal Kaley Cuoco’s limelight. Overall, despite a decent start, a solid (if unoriginal) premise, and a great single scene from Bill Nighy, this is a predictable dud. CALEB I can’t begin to understand what Role Play was trying to go for. It has the premise of a goofy rom-com, but is hell-bent on taking itself seriously. It’s not funny enough to be a comedy, but it’s not nearly exciting enough to function as a worthwhile thriller. It’s basically a dollar bin version of Black Widow (2021), but with far less action and twice the boring melodrama. The film can’t commit to a tone for longer than five minutes at a time, which makes the whole narrative feel hopelessly confused. From start to finish, Role Play is a total mess. PRESTON Yes, I fell asleep while watching director Thomas Vincent’s Role Play , and no, it wasn’t a particularly long day. Absolutely no chances are taken here, the fight choreography is rough, and the resulting boredom is quite impressive given my affinity for any story based on an assassin trying to live a double life. Kaley Cuoco and David Oyelowo have almost zero chemistry, and even if this were meant to be a comedy, the lack of commitment to that approach leaves it out of the realm of Mr. & Mrs. Smith and True Lies . Save this for chore day.

KINDS OF KINDNESS Starring: Emma Stone, Jesse Plemons, Willem Dafoe, Margaret Qualley, Hong Chau, Joe Alwyn, Mamoudou Athie, and Hunter Schafer Director: Yorgos Lanthimos QUENTIN After Poor Things , one had to expect at least a small hangover with director Yorgos Lanthimos’ next outing, so it’s not exactly surprising that Kinds of Kindness is underwhelming. Don’t get me wrong, it’s good; however, it might be Lanthimos’ least good movie, which is all because of the story structure. Kindness is basically an anthology of three short films, and there is inconsistency in their levels of intrigue and development. I would have rather watched any of the three as a standalone feature instead of the truncated versions we get here. Still, all the typically weird greatness you’d expect from Lanthimos and this cast are present. ADRIANO Kinds of Kindness sees co-writer/director Yorgos Lanthimos returning to his absurdist, cynical roots, and in many ways, it's a nice return. It delivers consistent laughs, and Lanthimos' direction constantly throws in bizarre little details that make the film even funnier. Plus, the cast is in on Lanthimos' weirdness. At just under 3 hours, the movie flies by. That said, my enjoyment of each story wavered, and I ended up coming away feeling empty. What is the big takeaway beyond freak entertainment? If that was the goal, then success, but it's not up to par with Lanthimos' best. NICK You know when you walk up to a group of people already mid-conversation? That's what watching Kinds of Kindness is like, but with three separate conversations. Each “chapter” contains a story strong enough to be a feature, but these stories often lack a true beginning or end, which leads things to feel both rushed and underdeveloped. However, that's not to say it's not entertaining. The performances are great, and as mentioned, the stories are very interesting; their potential just feels wasted in this format. Having said that, everyone seems to have a different opinion on what their favourite “chapter” is, so that’s fun. PRESTON A gentleman kicks up his legs and checks his phone until he falls asleep, snoring. A woman finishes her store-bought soda and leaves the theater. A stretch-happy man in short shorts and calf-length socks takes off his shoes and plays a dangerous game of foot vs. drinking straw. A couple converses. A worker drives her electric scooter halfway down the middle aisle, watches the film momentarily, then leaves (twice!). If four koalas were half-heartedly humping in row C, the parallelism to Kinds of Kindness would be uncanny. Only you can decide if that sounds entertaining or like a Kafkian nightmare. AMARÚ Poor Things was my first foray into director Yorgos Lanthimos, and with that film he gained favor with me. After Kinds of Kindness, y’all can have him back. I’m good with weird movies, but the weird needs purpose and reasoning. Kindness ’ weird was Yorgos playing The Sims, having the characters do random shit and imagining the arbitrary phrases they say. Every time I was getting remotely interested, some other unexplained weird shit happened or the segment would just end. Naaaaaaw… Maybe I’ll finally watch The Favourite to solidify the Yorgos I’ll watch and the Yorgos I won’t, because this was 100% the latter. This film was reviewed by Quentin as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2024 Cannes Film Festival.

AFRAID Starring: John Cho, Katherine Waterston, Havana Rose Liu, Lukita Maxwell, David Dastmalchian, and Keith Carradine Director: Chris Weitz ADRIANO As someone who believes AI is a true danger, AfrAId is not helping. It makes the bare-bones case against it, but never goes beyond "it's bad" and surface-level mockery. Plus, ironically, a lot of this movie feels like an AI-generated horror flick considering how lifeless, generic, and, above all, artificial it is. There is potential for an effective horror movie that takes a grounded stance against AI and its scary implications for humanity, but bad acting and weak scares make this yet another bland horror film, sadly. KATIE AfrAId badly executes a potentially strong premise, making a one-sided, definitive judgement on the increasing presence of artificial intelligence whilst ironically relying heavily on cheap-looking AI-generated imagery. AI has so many possibilities in terms of the surreal and uncanny imagery it can create, which is genuinely creepy when used sparingly and combined with real life. Although this is hinted at early on, the film ditches that approach and sets up multiple ideas without re-visiting and exploring them effectively. Fortunately, the performances are actually good, particularly John Cho and Katherine Waterston, whose talents elevate the film to watchable.

WHAT YOU WISH FOR Starring: Nick Stahl, Tamsin Topolski, Penelope Mitchell, Randy Vasquez, Juan Carlos Messier, Brian Groh, and Ariel Sierra Director: Nicholas Tomnay QUENTIN All in all, What You Wish For has several flaws. It moves a little too slowly (especially at the start), some of the acting is extremely wooden, and it could have used a lot more tension and suspense once the second act hits. Having said all that, I still enjoyed it, even if it did often remind me of better movies like The Menu . Plus, and maybe this is just me, but it’s nice to see Nick Stahl working again. I wouldn’t call it necessary viewing, but it’s a decent indie thriller, and probably one of the more surprising offerings I saw at Fantastic Fest. NICK The Menu was one of my favourite films last year, and while What You Wish For doesn't live up to it, it’s still a serviceable addition to the underrated culinary horror genre. Although the darker storyline shows potential, it’s hurt by average performances and pacing issues throughout. The message (as alluded to in the title) of your wishes not being what you expected would likely have had more impact with a more likable lead, but that doesn’t fall on Nick Stahl. Combine this with the lack of suspense and intrigue, and you have a film that I unfortunately expect to forget before long. PRESTON Be careful What You Wish For, indeed. Conceptually, director Nicholas Tomnay’s streaming feature is extremely clever, but requires some forgiveness of its somewhat cut-rate execution. The car green-screening looks like 1970’s era technology, the dialogue is stilted, and overall editing could have been better. Having conceded those points, the story’s originality and amusing plot carries you along for a thoroughly enjoyable experience. It’s easy to see why comparison to The Menu is warranted and deserving, even considering its faults. I had no expectations going in and had a great time, which is probably the right approach. KATIE I knew very little about What You Wish For going into it, which is undoubtedly the best way to experience this taught indie thriller. The film is the latest addition to a growing genre of social satires targeting the rich, and it's solidly entertaining and fun, even if it lacks the satirical bite of films like The Menu. Although the dialogue leaves much to be desired and some of the performances fall flat, the concept is engaging, it's darkly funny, the setting is gorgeous, and there is some interesting camerawork. Whilst it doesn’t serve up the sharpest satire, it's still worth trying. This film was reviewed by Quentin and Nick as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of Fantastic Fest 2023.

SHE CAME TO ME Starring: Peter Dinklage, Marisa Tomei, Anne Hathaway, Joanna Kulig, Brian d’Arcy James, Harlow Jane, and Evan A. Ellison Director: Rebecca Miller AMARÚ She Came to Me is the kind of quirky movie that usually doesn’t appeal to me. A lot of disparate yet intertwining stories that have their own absurdities and that could be movies in themselves, with plots featuring tones so different that it simultaneously feels like a dark comedy, a horror, a coming-of-age, and a romantic thriller. If not for its performances (Peter Dinklage and Marisa Tomei, in particular), I wouldn’t care one bit about what’s going on. But the characters’ awkwardness kept my heart racing so earnestly that I pushed past the “WTFs?” running through my mind. QUENTIN She Came to Me is reminiscent of Crazy, Stupid, Love , except on a more indie and far less clever scale. Most of the characters come off as too bougie for me to care about their self-made white people problems. Marisa Tomei’s Katrina, an opera-going tugboat captain, is addicted to “romance;” Peter Dinklage’s Steven, an opera composer, has writer’s block; Anne Hathaway’s Patricia is a neat freak. These aren’t real problems, and as such, I found it hard to sympathize with them, let alone find humor in their situations. I will file away Marisa Tomei as a tugboat captain for later, though. Don’t you kink shame me! PRESTON She Came to Me is the baby of writer and director Rebecca Miller, who gives us an authentically aligned romantic-comedy that feels far more pragmatic than other competing “rom-coms.” I mean, how can you beat the trio of Peter Dinklage, Anne Hathaway, and Marisa Tomei?! Each deliver a beautiful performance that reflect the brokenness of their character, imbuing them with convincing realism, even if their problems are of the “First World” variety. The film is hindered by multiple narratives that are crammed in, but its messiness is also why I enjoyed it.

THE FIRST OMEN Starring: Nell Tiger Free, Tawfeek Barhom, Sônia Braga, Ralph Ineson, and Bill Nighy Director: Arkasha Stevenson ADRIANO For a film with so much seemingly going on, I found The First Omen remarkably dull. The film is good at building tension from scene to scene, but I wish it had relied less on atmosphere and creepy imagery and more on jump scares and grisly gore to get the audience to react. Nell Tiger Free is a fantastic lead, though; however, in the end, I found the film to be a wholly forgettable experience, with one absurdly laughable final scene attempting to get an applause break by connecting it to the original film. NICK You may enjoy The First Omen as long as you don’t think about it too hard. If so, you’re bound to scratch your head due to its habit of leaving unanswered questions. This extended build-up to the story of Damien (which the film treats as if it’s a big reveal in spite of the film being called The First Omen ) does an adequate job setting up the character’s future. However, the majority of the film can be a bit of an arduous journey to reach its ultimate destination. Points for setting the table, but Damien needs to pick up the pace if he’s getting a follow-up. PRESTON The First Omen is a refreshingly creepy prequel that revives a classic storyline. Its biggest success lies in its alignment with the original series several decades later and the sufficiently eerie storyline that doesn't overly rely on jump scares and similarly cheap shenanigans to induce fear, even if the scariness factor isn’t off the charts. The main issue is an overlong runtime that struggles to keep its audience engaged, but the actual scene-by-scene editing is quite exceptional. Good acting and great cinematography round out a very respectable outing for this struggling genre.

MAD CATS Starring: Shô Mineo, Yûya Matsuura, Ayane, Michael Aaron Stone, and So Yamanaka Director: Reiki Tsuno This film has been reviewed by Quentin and Paige as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2023 Fantasia International Film Festival. PAIGE Written and directed by Reiki Tsuno, Mad Cats is a bizarre and quirky movie that somehow manages to be engaging throughout, particularly as the movie does a fairly good job of blending its tension and ridiculousness. Everyone in front of and behind the camera seem to embrace the silliness that is occurring onscreen, which allows it to be that much more enjoyable. But I must admit, this foreign flick will have you scratching your head a lot, leaving you to think “what the eff am I watching?” QUENTIN When a movie’s logline includes “…taking on a pack of vicious monster cats determined to execute unscrupulous pet shop owners,” you expect two things: silliness and… well, monster cats. Mad Cats certainly has the silliness, self-awaringly leaning into Japan’s specific brand of campy humor (not unlike what Hot Fuzz did with British humor). However, saying it has monster cats would be like saying Kill Bill has monster snakes because of the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad. There are no cats; it’s just a gang of women acting like cats, which was very disappointing. Still, I chuckled enough at the absurdist humor, so not a total loss.

WICKED LITTLE LETTERS Starring: Olivia Colman, Jessie Buckley, Anjana Vasan, Joanna Scanlan, Gemma Jones, Malachi Kirby, Lolly Adefope, Eileen Atkins, and Timothy Spall Director: Thea Sharrock NICK Wicked Little Letters is one cheeky little fucker of a film. The surprisingly funny and crass affair is headlined by the devilishly good Olivia Colman and Jessie Buckley at their most raunchy. Colman, in particular, shines, with even just her facial expressions bringing on the laughter. The mystery may show its cards a little early in the film, but that can be forgiven as the “who” never feels like the point. Instead, just go for the ride of this sure-to-be crowd-pleaser. I’m not saying you need to see Wicked Little Letters , but some may think you’re a bloody wanker if you don’t. ADRIANO One can look at Wicked Little Letters and say, “Oh, look, another charming British comedy.” There is some truth to that. However, it goes beyond that to deliver more poignancy than I expected. Olivia Colman and Jessie Buckley are both amazing (they always are), but I loved the whole ensemble. Each actor is committed to this bizarre story that intrigues and delights at the same time. The structure isn't completely sound, but with what lies at the end of Wicked Little Letters , it’s hard to not at least smile. QUENTIN For me, Wicked Little Letters was the surprise overachiever of 2023’s Zurich Film Festival. I’ve often been accused of not liking “lady movies,” but this cheeky little gem is raunchily (in language only) delightful. Admittedly, a charmingly crass Jessie Buckley alongside Olivia Colman simply doing what Olivia Colman does can cover for a lot of flaws, but it’s not like this easy-going mystery has many flaws to begin with. It may feel slight, especially pertaining to the mystery aspect, but it’s an enjoyably simple watch that ultimately entertains. Think of it as the movie version of a good “beach read.” AMARÚ Wicked Little Letters isn’t just the title of this darkly intelligent comedy, but it’s also the perfect descriptor for writer Jonny Sweet’s screenplay, which is tremendously mean-spirited and absolutely perfect. Each letter of every word is indeed a wicked vehicle for Olivia Colman to be hilariously devilish, Timothy Spall to be maddeningly curmudgeon, and Jessie Buckley to be delightfully crass. The rampant embarrassment of ignorance the script deftly weaves left me rightfully frustrated alongside standout Anjana Vasan’s “woman officer” Moss as she tries untangling a web of lies, deceit, and stupidity that is simultaneously gripping, infuriating, and hysterical. PRESTON Wicked Little Letters nestles itself quite nicely into the slightly-naughty-but-charming British comedy realm. Olivia Colman is perfectly cast, and Jessie Buckley, Anjana Vasan, and Timothy Spall are terrific here as well. Even though the acting is well done and the thematic messaging appropriate, with the addition of it being based on a true story certainly helping, I still found the film to be rather unremarkable. As bold as the story is meant to be, I wish that the actual production and editing was a bit more daring, although that may just be my Guy Ritchie fan showing. This film was reviewed by Adriano, Nick, and Quentin as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2023 Toronto International Film Festival and the 2023 Zurich Film Festival, respectively.

BETTER MAN Starring: Robbie Williams, Jonno Davies, Steve Pemberton, Alison Steadman, Kate Mulvany, Frazer Hadfield, Raechelle Banno, and Damon Herriman Director: Michael Gracey NICK I’ve long been a fan of Robbie Williams, so perhaps I enjoyed Better Man as much as I did because of my familiarity with everything. But, honestly, I just think it’s a great film. Whether it’s the stylistic decisions that realistically shouldn’t work but do, or the spectacle of all the musical numbers, everything succeeds because of Robbie. A supremely creative (and narcissistic) showman, the man shies away from nothing to tell his story, demons and all. It makes for a refreshing and relatable examination. I was thrilled, I was moved, and as Robbie would have wanted, I was entertained. Give this one a shot. ADRIANO My expectations for Better Man were really low, given that director/co-writer Michael Gracey's last film, The Greatest Showman , is one of my least favourite movies ever. So in that regard, I suppose Better Man surpassed my expectations. The CGI monkey looks amazing, and I do admire how unsanitized the approach to Robbie Williams’ life is. That said, while the movie tries throwing some flashing lights and gimmicks at us, it doesn't change the fact that it follows an uninteresting and basic biopic format. It certainly wasn't as bad as I feared, but I'll never see it again. AMARÚ Music biopics with unique deliveries are now two for two in 2024. Better Man is an unadulterated window into Robbie Williams’ soul, full of heart and heartbreaking emotional resonance. Williams and Jonno Davies’ joint mo-cap performance harnesses every inch of Robbie’s hardships and triumphs, with CGI matching Matt Reeves’ Planet of the Apes -level detail. Combined with Michael Gracey’s direction, which is as visually evocative as Williams is a cheeky bastard, you have a full-blown emotional knock out. It’s a bit long, but when you get to see that deep into someone’s heart, you’ll take the extra minutes of laughs, smiles, and tears. PAIGE Better Man is a traditional and ostentatious musical biopic, but despite its unique take on the genre, once you peel back the layers, it’s just another generic rags-to-riches story. Without the CGI monkey (which looks fantastic), the film doesn’t really make a compelling case for Robbie Williams to have his story told. Don’t get me wrong, the movie is certainly amusing, and director Michael Gracey directs some of the best musical sequences of the year, but the overall narrative feels drawn out at times. Maybe if I were a bigger fan of Williams, I’d value this outlandish story more. KATIE Better Man, a musical biopic about Robbie Williams, who is portrayed as a CGI ape amongst an otherwise human cast, is a creative gamble that pays off spectacularly. I didn’t expect to enjoy this as much as I did, and the addition of the CGI ape is wonderfully strange without distracting from the narrative, instead making it all the more captivating. Although it doesn’t stray from the usual rise-to-stardom biopic formula, the bold stylistic choices set it apart and enable a surprisingly emotionally engaging story that boasts immersive visuals and riotously entertaining musical setpieces. This film was reviewed by Nick and Adriano as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2024 Toronto International Film Festival.

PLAY DIRTY Starring: Mark Wahlberg, LaKeith Stanfield, Rosa Salazar, Keegan-Michael Key, Chukwudi Iwuji, Nat Wolff, Gretchen Mol, Thomas Jane, Hemky Madera, Alejandro Edda, Claire Lovering, Chai Hansen, and Tony Shalhoub Director: Shane Black ADRIANO After The Predator , I was hoping to see a return to form from director/co-writer Shane Black. On paper, Play Dirty appears to be exactly that, with its style of crime comedy hijinks, some of which are present here; however, something crucial is missing: Black's personality. As much humour and action as there is, there's a stylistic void here, and the film winds up being dull as a result, with Mark Wahlberg looking half asleep in every scene, which certainly does not help. This isn't an awful movie - in fact, it's just inoffensively bad - but that doesn't mean I'm not disappointed. ROBERT You may be unaware, but Play Dirty is the seventh iteration of the character Parker being portrayed on film, with notable actors like Robert Duvall, Mel Gibson, and Jason Statham previously playing the professional robber. Unfortunately, despite Mark Wahlberg’s history in films like The Italian Job and Contraband playing a master thief, it is a poor fit this time. Shane Black is at his best when he's not pigeonholed by existing IP and getting to craft his own world and dialogue. This seems like he was neutered. Play Dirty is too long, and the CGI is atrocious; it shouldn't steal a minute of your time.