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NIGHT SWIM Starring: Kerry Condon, Wyatt Russell, Amélie Hoeferle, Nancy Lenehan, Gavin Warren, Jodi Long, Eddie Martinez, Elijah Roberts, and Ayazhan Dalabayeva Director: Bryce McGuire NICK Although the Night Swim trailer didn’t inspire confidence, I went into it with an open mind. I wasn’t expecting much, just a fun bit of spooky storytelling to waste 98 minutes on. What I got, however, was neither fun nor spooky. It’s been a while since a film has irked me as much as this one due to its gaps in logic (both big and small) and its inability to create any tension whatsoever. Aside from myself and my audience getting some laughs at the expense of the film, the only thing Night Swim made me feel was bored. A legitimate early contender for Worst of 2024. CALEB I was hoping Night Swim would be another 'fun-bad' horror movie like M3GAN (2023). Unfortunately, it isn’t fun at all, but it certainly is bad. For a story about a haunted swimming pool, the script takes itself far too seriously. The result is a maddeningly dull horror flick, devoid of any interesting concepts or exciting sequences. The effects are mediocre, the cinematography is flat, and the blatant lack of style is borderline insulting. Maybe if it took a few risks, it could’ve been fun, but Night Swim seems content playing in the shallow end where it’s safe… and boring. PRESTON Watching Night Swim can be equated to something excruciatingly mundane…going to the grocery store, perhaps? There are some moments of complete absurdity and mild perturbances, but it’s otherwise filled with the most unremarkable circumstances. I don’t know what it is about Blumhouse Productions’ films that make them solidly entertaining OR a complete trashcan fire, but this most recent release definitely falls into the latter category. If you are a fan of B-horror movies (even when they aren’t intentionally that way), you might get a kick out of watching when it hits streaming, but for everyone else…be forewarned. KATIE My expectations for Night Swim were not high, but I was hoping for some trashy, so-bad-its-good fun. Unfortunately, instead of leaning into the absurdity of the premise, it takes itself far too seriously, and is dull as a result. It is simply not scary in the slightest, struggling to maintain any sense of tension, and despite its relatively short run-time, it still feels too long, especially as the final act is drowning in clumsy exposition. The only redeeming aspect of the film is Kerry Condon, who gives the best performance she can in spite of the script and ridiculous plot.

PRISONER'S DAUGHTER Starring: Kate Beckinsale, Brian Cox, Christopher Convery, Ernie Hudson, and Tyson Ritter Director: Catherine Hardwicke NICK Did I enjoy Prisoner's Daughter ? Yes. Am I likely to remember it a year from now? Probably not. All in all, that really sums things up regarding this film. This is a movie that does nothing great and few things poorly, yet it kept my attention through its runtime. The strongest aspect of the film is the grandfather/grandson dynamic between Brian Cox and Christopher Convery, while the weakest is the painfully generic soundtrack that sounds like an amateur YouTube tribute video. Everything else is…fine. It may not light your world on fire, but you can do worse than Prisoner’s Daughter . QUENTIN The phrase “no need to reinvent the wheel” exists for a reason, and Prisoner’s Daughter is a very well-made wheel. It’s content to tell a fairly standard story about an estranged father and daughter (and grandchild), but it does so on the back of excellent performances from Brian Cox and Kate Beckinsale. The film even manages to subvert some of the more modest expectations, which came as a pleasant surprise. It’s not mind-blowing by any means, but it’s the kind of efficiently made, unpretentious grownup fare that we don’t see very often anymore. This film was reviewed by Nick and Quentin as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2022 Toronto International Film Festival.

MASH VILLE Starring: Park Jong-hwan, Jeon Sin-hwan, and Jin Ye-sol Director: Hwang Wook This film has been reviewed by Nick and Quentin as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2024 Fantasia International Film Festival. NICK I don't partake in hallucinogenic drugs, but I can only imagine that's how director Hwang Wook wants you to watch this film. Mash Ville is bright, loud, campy, frenetic, and all over the map in a way that would make SNL 's Stefon blush. This film has everything: stylish cult members, poison liquor, shotguns, drunk cops, fake corpses, real corpses, the purest love... There's barely a coherent story here, and pretty much everyone in this thing is a cartoon character brought to life… but damn if I wasn't entertained. Mash Ville likely falls into the "so bad it's good” category, but I’ve certainly seen worse this year. QUENTIN Mash Ville is one of the most “extra, try-hard” movies I’ve ever seen. This chaotic mashup (get the title?) of comedic, western, thriller, crime drama, and action sensibilities makes no damn sense, nor is it remotely funny. Admittedly, I’m of the opinion that comedy is a genre that doesn’t work with subtitles because so much relies on timing, but still… I generally had no idea what was going on. I suppose that could mean something was lost in translation, but other than the Ennio Morricone-inspired score, I can’t call anything about Mash Ville watchable. How Hwang Wook won Best Director for this, I’ll never know.

THE LUCKIEST MAN IN AMERICA Starring: Paul Walter Hauser, Walton Goggins, David Strathairn, Maisie Williams, Haley Bennett, Shamier Anderson, David Rysdahl, Johnny Knoxville, Brian Geraghty, Patti Harrison, Shaunette Renée Wilson, and James Wolk Director: Samir Oliveros NICK If you're yet to be convinced that Paul Walter Hauser deserves more leading roles, The Luckiest Man in America is here to change your mind. This throwback true story of Michael Larson (Hauser) and the Press Your Luck scandal peeks behind the curtain of the events to keep the uninitiated wondering what will happen next. Director Samir Oliveros transports you back to the 80s with a tight story and vibrant colour palette that makes you feel like you are in the studio audience. No bells and whistles, just an honest approach to the story, which is precisely what Luckiest Man calls for. ADRIANO The Luckiest Man in America is probably the best version of what a movie adaptation of this story could look like. The story of Michael Larson (Paul Walter Hauser) isn't anything that grand, and I kinda thought the movie's attempts to make him out to be some folk hero were a little misguided; however, I still had fun. Hauser gives yet another great, ego-less performance that's easy to root for, and I enjoyed the kinetic editing. The writing is serviceable enough too, with some effective laughs and heart thrown in there. The overall experience was pleasant but forgettable. PAIGE Based on a true event, The Luckiest Man in America is a stylish flick that vividly captures the aesthetic of a 1980s game show. Its sleek and breezy runtime is bolstered by a great supporting cast and, of course, another outstanding and underrated performance from Paul Walter Hauser. Despite this, the film is a bit restrained due to its story not diving deep enough into its characters or ideas. In the end, it may not stick the landing, but it’s at least an entertaining watch that puts you on the set to watch these stakes unfold. KATIE The Luckiest Man in America is a solidly entertaining and stylish drama based on the true story of a 1980s game show scandal. Paul Walter Hauser is fantastic in the leading role as Michael Larson, bringing an uncomfortable intensity that is simultaneously disarming and unnerving. Considering it's based on real life, the film does well at generating suspense, intrigue, and exploring Larson’s motivations, enhanced by the brisk pacing and energetic editing, and the TV studio setting and tight camerawork add an element of claustrophobic tension. It’s not groundbreaking, but The Luckiest Man in America is a fun watch. This film was reviewed by Nick and Adriano as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2024 Toronto International Film Festival.

QUASI Starring: Jay Chandrasekhar, Kevin Heffernan, Steve Lemme, Paul Soter, Erik Stolhanske, Adrianne Palicki, Eugene Cordero, and Marcus Henderson Director: Kevin Heffernan JOSEPH Full disclosure, outside of Beerfest , I’m unfamiliar with Broken Lizard’s filmography. That being said, I can confidently say Quasi is probably their worst film yet. There are some chuckle worthy moments, but only enough to count on one hand. I cannot fathom if the humor of this film is dated or just too stupid (or too smart?) for its own good. Even with copious amounts of alcohol or weed, I’m sure Quasi will barely elicit a reaction. You’re far better off rewatching an old favorite or just going to sleep. QUENTIN Quasi is the worst movie I’ve seen in years. There are no jokes, quotable one-liners, or even mediocre production values to be found here. Hell, the outtakes aren’t even funny. In fact, with each Broken Lizard member playing two roles, it’s almost like no one else wanted to be associated with it. I have no doubt the comedy troupe found the idea hysterical while discussing it over bong rips, but this won’t even hit with the stoners. In terms of hilariousness, it’s the opposite of Super Troopers . No one should watch this, and no one should be giving Broken Lizard more money to make movies.

THE ACCOUNTANT 2 Starring: Ben Affleck, Jon Bernthal, Cynthia Addai-Robinson, Daniella Pineda, Allison Robertson, Robert Morgan, Grant Harvey, Andrew Howard, and J.K. Simmons Director: Gavin O’Connor QUENTIN While The Accountant 2 might be one of the most unexpected, never-asked-for sequels to come along in recent memory, I can’t deny that it’s a fun time at the movies. Sure, the story is messy and convoluted, but I’d watch Ben Affleck and (especially) Jon Bernthal’s Rain Man Assassin schtick for 10 more movies. Their chemistry is 90 percent of the reason this movie works, with the extra 10 percent going to director Gavin O’Connor for the explosive action beats and writer Bill Dubuque for the surprising amount of hilarity. I’m not sure if it’s “better” than the first one, but it’s certainly more entertaining. ADRIANO Confession time: I don't understand the infatuation with The Accountant . It never engaged me, nor did I find it very fun. So with The Accountant 2 , there is a surprising improvement, in that I found it to be a very fun mess. The movie takes itself much less seriously, which makes way for genuine enjoyment. Jon Bernthal's amazing performance also helps. Unfortunately, it couldn't pick a tone to save its life, never finding a proper balance between familial drama and wacky comedy, plus pretty irresponsible portrayals of human trafficking. It's still not very good, but it's more entertaining, I suppose. BODE I didn’t think much of The Accountant , but given how successful it was, I wasn’t totally surprised we got a sequel. I’m more surprised that The Accountant 2 is better than it really should be. Despite its uneven tonal shifts, the tastelessness of its human trafficking subplot, and doubling-down on its Hollywood treatment of autism, it all manages to go down easy since it doesn’t take itself seriously, the action is clean, there’s charm in Ben Affleck and Jon Bernthal’s back-and-forth, and there’s refreshing empathy for those with ASD. It’s a mess, but a decently entertaining one.

BLUE MOON Starring: Ethan Hawke, Margaret Qualley, Bobby Cannavale, and Andrew Scott Director: Richard Linklater ADRIANO Typically, with a chamber piece like Blue Moon , you can't help but feel like you're watching a play. But director Richard Linklater embraces that, almost making sure you feel that way. His direction, mixed with the whip-smart script from Robert Kaplow, immerses us in the staginess of this bar setting, with Ethan Hawke's flamboyant character work giving it extra life through his monologues. It's one of my favourite Hawke performances, in fact. I can understand if Blue Moon doesn't work for you, but its energy and pizzazz, despite its limited setting, made for an entertaining and emotional powerhouse. QUENTIN For better or worse, Blue Moon feels very much like a stage play, a chamber piece driven entirely by bantery dialogue and actors acting. There is no real action, and any semblance of conflict is relegated to passive-aggressive remarks and subtle glances. Admittedly, the dialogue has an almost poetic pitter-patter to it that is hypnotic in the early going, made especially so by Ethan Hawke’s terrific performance as an internally depressed man struggling to put on a happy face. But this is the movie equivalent of a nearby stranger loudly complaining about his life to the bartender; eventually, you just want the guy to be quiet. AMARÚ Ethan Hawke is the Sun in Blue Moon , with celestial talents Andrew Scott, Margaret Qualley, and Bobby Cannavale revolving around his inescapable gravity. So inescapable is he, that when we have to share that gravity with one of those revolving stars, it slightly dampens the experience as we wait to have him all to ourselves again. But only slightly, as Hawke and his co-stars’ vigorous sparring is beautifully captured through Richard Linklater’s encompassing direction and Robert Kaplow’s sharp writing. Blue Moon is funny, sentimental, exhilarating, heartbreaking, and as fervently conflicting as all the complicated emotions Hawke effortlessly portrays as lyrical legend Lorenz Hart. This film was reviewed by Adriano as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2025 Toronto International Film Festival.

SEEDS Starring: Kaniehtiio Horn, Dallas Goldtooth, Meegwun Fairbrother, Dylan Cook, and Graham Greene Director: Kaniehtiio Horn ADRIANO Seeds is very messy. The movie attempts to comment on the preservation of reservation communities, but, instead, it winds up being as shallow as the Gen-Z archetypes the film is trying to satirize. The movie also can't pick a tone to save its life. I'm not saying I never had fun, but the movie never commits to the horror aspects while a lot of the comedy just falls flat. On top of that, a lot of the flashy concepts are underdeveloped to the point of being nonsense. The ending does leave the film on a high note, but it's an overall mess. PRESTON Seeds is a unique horror film in that it is a Native American/First Nations celebration, specifically of the Mohawk people, with a focus on their history, culture, and values. The lead actress, Kaniehtiio Horn (Ziggy), also happens to be both the writer and director while displaying extremely capable acting skills. However, the movie is a mildly masked but searing attack on the Monsanto corporation that lies somewhere between the border of conspiracy theory and absolute absurdism, and when coupled with the implausibility of the injected “thrill” and the ridiculous cat attack (no, seriously), it made the journey more than regretful for me. QUENTIN Writer-director-star Kaniehtiio Horn (Tanis, to the Letterkenny fans out there) seemingly has no idea what she is doing with Seeds . Granted, a lot can be blamed on its low-budget, campy Canadian trappings, but for a movie billed as a horror comedy, there is very little comedy and almost no horror. I also can’t tell if this is meant to be a commentary on influencer culture, a home invasion movie, an exploration into preserving Native traditions, or a takedown of corporate farming and agricultural biotechnology. It truly is all over the place, both tonally and in story, which is only amplified by the short 82-minute runtime. This film was reviewed by Adriano as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2024 Toronto International Film Festival.

THE GREATEST HITS Starring: Lucy Boynton, David Corenswet, Justin H. Min, Austin Crute, Retta, Nelly Furtado, Tom Yi, Jenne Kang, and Andie Ju Director: Ned Benson KATIE The concept of The Greatest Hits is far more compelling than its execution because it never commits to the interesting idea at its core, treating it as an obstacle rather than exploring its potential. We also aren't given enough time with protagonist Harriet’s (Lucy Boynton) former boyfriend, so I didn’t care about him or understand her infatuation with their relationship. As soon as the new love interest (Justin H. Min) is introduced, it's obvious what will happen; however, he and Harriet lack romantic chemistry, which is a shame since I can forgive pretty much anything in a romance if the leads have a strong connection. PAIGE The Greatest Hits is a great love letter to the power of music, but as a love story, it falls flat. Even though the movie doesn't spend much time establishing the concept, it was probably necessary so that the story could add weight to the heavy themes of pain and loss. The general beats of the plot feel a bit out of tune despite there being some touching, sentimental moments strewn throughout the film. All in all, The Greatest Hits is a charming yet unsatisfying romance movie.

THE MAN IN MY BASEMENT Starring: Corey Hawkins, Willem Dafoe, Anna Diop, Jonathan Ajayi, and Pamela Nomvete Director: Nadia Latif AMARÚ Nadia Latif’s directorial debut is a darkly meditative look into family legacy, history (specifically surrounding Black people in the U.S.), and self-worth that uses spooky imagery and sinister blocking to create an eerie tone. But truthfully, her great direction is merely a runway to showcase a career-best performance from Corey Hawkins. It’s very hard to make you forget about Willem Dafoe, but Hawkins’ commanding desperation (which, of course, is elevated by Dafoe being Dafoe) is the lynchpin on which every aspect of this film turns. It’s a tremendously shattering performance that delivers a remarkably thought-provoking movie. NICK Maybe I’ve just gotten too used to Willem Dafoe playing outlandish characters, and expected something more in that vein, but I found The Man in My Basement to be a bit of a bore. I can’t put this on the performances of Dafoe or Corey Hawkins because they’re fine, if unspectacular. I just think everything hit a lull following its mysterious setup. It’s not a film devoid of good ideas, it just doesn’t present them in a way that could keep my attention. There’s something here, no doubt, but it needed a lot more work to be brought to fruition. ADRIANO As effective as the eeriness of The Man in My Basement is, I'm afraid I have no clue what the goal of this was. Corey Hawkins and Willem Dafoe are great, but the story never clarifies its ultimate trajectory. It brings up grand points about class, colonialism, the history of race in America, and even smaller stuff like struggling to get by. But if that feels like too much for one film, it's because it is, and it never quite finds enough balance to actually make a statement. I would chalk this down as a swing and a miss, even though it's well-made. ROBERT After reflecting on The Man in My Basement for a while, I haven’t concluded what I was supposed to take away from it. I understand there are considerations about family legacy, history and how those often get co-opted, but with two disparate storylines floating around Corey Hawkins’ Charles, I am uncertain if they were meant to intertwine into a clearer message. The performances are fine and there is a general creepiness to it, but being creepy without a salient reason feels incomplete, which is where I ended up with the film. You don’t need to lock yourself away for this one. BODE With The Man in My Basement , director Nadia Latif crafts a debut feature that is as hauntingly surreal as it is frustratingly overstuffed. In tackling as many themes as it does, such as grief, generational trauma, and colonial history, it risks stumbling under its own weight (and honestly makes the film longer than it should be). But the eerie atmosphere Latif creates is effective all throughout, thanks to some of her blocking and unsettling sound design. Corey Hawkins and Willem Dafoe both deliver great performances as well, enlivening much of their material. Messy for sure, but it’s never not interesting. This film was reviewed by Amarú and Nick as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2025 Toronto International Film Festival.

UNFROSTED Starring: Jerry Seinfeld, Melissa McCarthy, Jim Gaffigan, Max Greenfield, Hugh Grant, and Amy Schumer Director: Jerry Seinfeld AMARÚ There’s a reason I never really watched Saturday Night Live . By the time I was old enough to be interested, the legends had already left and the new stars were stuck doing unfunny skits. That last bit is what immediately came to mind watching a huge number of well-known comedians come together to be as unfunny as they are in Unfrosted . Jerry Seinfeld’s “what’s the deal?” schtick is great for his stand up, but it doesn’t make a good movie. The cast must have been doing Seinfeld a favor because their uber-obvious, literal punchlines fail to reach even a serviceable semblance of satirical skill. ADRIANO I knew Unfrosted wasn't going to be good, but I’m a big Jerry Seinfeld fan. So, when I turned it on, I said "let's turn the brain off and have some laughs." Even with that mindset, this was a painful movie to sit through. Not only did I not laugh once, but the movie also quickly abandons its simple concept of "here's how Pop Tarts happened" for an abundance of unfunny bits and subplots that amount to nothing. I’m just confused as to why exactly this movie was made. I'm sad to say, Seinfeld is simply past his prime. QUENTIN The most remarkable thing about Unfrosted is just how unremarkable it is. With a stacked cast full of A-list comedians and celebrity cameos, not to mention a delightfully silly premise, how did this movie become so bland and boring? I’ll give Jerry Seinfeld credit as the director because he has created a colorfully goofy world featuring a tremendous 1960s pastiche, but as a writer? Oh man. So many “jokes” from so many comedy stars, and almost none of them land. One has to imagine that being on set was a riot, but none of that comes through on the screen. Overall, an unfunny disappointment. KATIE My feelings about Unfrosted align with my opinion on Pop Tarts: somehow both overwhelmingly sweet yet bland and devoid of substance. I was bombarded by innuendos, goofy gags, references, and cameos at a staggering rate, and some of the dialogue is so inconceivably stupid that I couldn’t help but laugh. Despite this, it is often dull, featuring, at best, half-hearted performances, but it's also so silly and dedicated to the pastel 1960s aesthetic that, I’m ashamed to admit, it’s kind of fun, but not quite good. Honestly, I’m left confused by the whole ordeal. PRESTON Unfrosted is deceivingly marketed as a nostalgic, satirical jaunt down semi-historical memory lane. However, it seems that Jerry Seinfeld’s legacy only works to lure a star-studded cast to serve as the enticing central-filling to a film that instead resembles the empty shell of the treat it attempts to exploit. Perhaps I go too far, but I felt a Good Will Hunting -esque waste of potential while I endured through its shallow comedic implementation. A few jokes land and it’s watchable, but I was so confused that I thought I might have been watching what would have otherwise been an impressive improv performance.

TALK TO ME Starring: Sophie Wilde, Joe Bird, Alexandra Jensen, Otis Dhanji, Chris Alosio, Zoe Terakes, and Miranda Otto Directors: Danny and Michael Philippou NICK Harkening back to games like Bloody Mary, Talk to Me takes things one step further as it not only turns possession into a game, but a game that becomes the equivalent of a street drug. Directors Danny and Michael Philippou have crafted a new take in a bloated genre that isn’t reliant on jump scares to unsettle you. Instead, they use foreshadowing and metaphors to navigate the way we handle grief. Much like Ari Aster with Hereditary , I expect this to be a launching pad for the two brothers. The Horror King of 2023 is here, and I can’t see it being unseated anytime soon. PAIGE Hands down, this is the best horror flick of the year thus far. If the directors (Danny and Michael Philippou) decide to stick with this genre, I think horror fans will be in good hands because Talk to Me will rattle you to your core with how unsettling and chilling it is. This A24 gem is a stylish and disturbing tale of grief and loss, but what gives it the upper hand is its killer cast, spearheaded by Sophie Wilde. This movie will keep you on edge from start to finish, it's that bloody good. ADRIANO Talk to Me is the kind of movie you need to see to believe. Debut directors Danny and Michael Philippou get full freedom to make a wild and deranged flick, the kind of film that once its central premise kicks in, it never lets up. It’s bloody, it’s insane, and despite its short runtime, it takes its time to tell a genuine story about grief, anchored by a star-making performance by Sophie Wilde. Plus, the grand finale is the perfect way to end such a frightening ride, and if a prequel were to be made, I wouldn’t be upset.