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MICHAEL Starring: Jaafar Jackson, Colman Domingo, Nia Long, Miles Teller, Juliano Valdi, Kendrick Sampson, Laura Harrier, Larenz Tate and KeiLyn Durrel Jones Director: Antoine Fuqua AMARÚ There’s no denying Michael Jackson’s star-power (Mr. Obvious over here) because even with a cookie-cutter film like Michael , I couldn’t help but get goosebumps watching this slew of greatest hits. Antoine Fuqua’s grand, music-video like direction weirdly mixes well with what’s normally uncanny-valley CGI to enhance the fairytale aesthetic of Mike’s (Jaafar Jackson) world. The casting is outstanding, with Colman Domingo and Nia Long delivering wonderfully, but it’s Jackson who disappears into his uncle. The voice, the moves, the demeanor are all wildly perfect. Too bad the emotional beats were barely grazed in favor of music montages. Maybe the sequel, though. NICK Michael is a coming-of-age story instead of one that spans Michael Jackson’s (Jaafar Jackson) lifetime, focusing heavily on his relationship with his overbearing father (Colman Domingo). The film avoids many of his controversial moments, eschewing that to focus on Michael's rise and undeniable talent. Jaafar Jackson disappears into Michael, not just on stage, but also through showcasing his child-like personality. Yet with no depth in the storytelling and an abundance of musical re-creations, the dramatic moments never hit their desired level. As a celebration of one of the greatest artists of all time, however, it does its job… even if it is a puff piece. ADRIANO In the wave of musical biopics, Michael Jackson was inevitably going to get his story told. Michael is the worst case scenario of safe and generic storytelling. Excising all of the interesting dynamics of Jackson’s life (played to an occasionally reincarnated degree by Jaafar Jackson), the film is dumbed down to an oversimplified victim narrative and a stakeless greatest hits album. None of this surprised me. What did surprise me was how dull it was. From the baffling direction choices of Antoine Fuqua to the sanitized portrayal of a wild personality, Michael is bad… really, really bad.

HYPNOTIC Starring: Ben Affleck, Alice Braga, JD Pardo, Dayo Okeniyi, Jeff Fahey, Jackie Earle Haley, and William Fichtner Director: Robert Rodriguez QUENTIN While there is an interesting idea and a decent twist at its (only 90-minute) core, everything about Hypnotic feels dated. Between the procedural-meets-slight-sci-fi angle that was huge in the early 2000s (remember Déjà Vu and Next ?) to Ben Affleck’s surly, Max Payne -inspired line delivery, this movie might have been a hit during the actor’s Paycheck era. Still, I can’t say it’s boring, but it’s not particularly entertaining either since everything is so noirishly dark and dour. Mostly, I’m left wondering, 1. what happened to Robert Rodriguez, who used to be among my favorite directors?; and 2. why, in 2023, did Affleck sign on for this? NICK "Dated" doesn't even begin to describe how Hypnotic feels. It's the kind of movie you'd come across on TBS while channel-surfing in the late 90s (which makes sense as the script was written back in 2002). Not bad enough to be terrible, nor solid enough to be good, it just sits in mediocrity. The action, writing, and performances leave no lasting impression, and the fact that Ben Affleck spent time on this project is honestly perplexing. Hopefully, director Robert Rodriguez will stop wasting his time with films like this and turn his focus to the long delayed Alita: Battle Angel sequel instead. JACOB Hypnotic has a lot of promise in its base elements and grounded roots, but it does eventually fall victim to biting off more than it can chew. Conceptually, it’s an interesting (if somewhat predictable) watch, but in its execution, the story becomes so convoluted and messy that the audience doesn’t really have anything concrete to hang onto by the film’s end, making it feel ultimately fruitless. Even with Alice Braga and William Fichtner doing what they can to elevate the material, neither can save the viewer from noticing Ben Affleck’s boredom with a script that doesn’t give him much actual depth. AMARÚ One word I never thought I would connect with director Robert Rodriguez is “bland.” However, when it comes to his latest thriller, Hypnotic , even his stylized attempts at science-fiction can’t cover for the boring action, expositional conveniences, and… well… bland world-building. After about the 10th time Diana (Alice Braga) explained something to Danny (Ben Affleck) about the rules of Rodriguez’s super-powered world, I was checked out; Then, the line “What? I have powers all of a sudden?” was uttered and I couldn’t help but laugh incredulously at the rest of the film. Sorry, Rob, but this one ain’t it. PAIGE Hypnotic honestly feels like a Walmart-version of a Christopher Nolan film. While the concept of the movie is pretty cool, the imagery looks cheap and the script needs way more depth. The actors try their best to elevate it as much as possible, but the script leaves them all, especially Ben Affleck, with little to work with. The fact that Robert Rodriguez, a veteran director, made this is kind of mind-boggling because of how amateur it looks and feels. With all that said, Hypnotic is fast-paced and will keep viewers guessing throughout.

STRANGE WAY OF LIFE Starring: Ethan Hawke and Pedro Pascal Director: Pedro Almodóvar NICK At only 31 minutes, Strange Way of Life feels like the prologue to a longer story. Both Ethan Hawke and Pedro Pascal provide instantly interesting characters, but they’re never given the chance at deep exploration. Their passion is often relegated to longing looks and helpless pleas that feel like they’re bubbling towards the climax of a full-length feature film that never comes. Although the story may fall short, Pedro Almodóvar’s direction suits the Western genre wonderfully, and he handles this queer love story with care. Considering the cast and scope, I understand why this was made as a short film, but it’s an incomplete tale. AMARÚ Having never seen a Pedro Almodóvar film, I’m not sure if Strange Way of Life is an accurate representation of his work, but if his full-length features are anything like the 31-minute short, I’m going to start making a better effort at viewing his work because this short is tense and well-acted, with vigorous performances from Ethan Hawke and Pedro Pascal. Almodóvar is able to speak volumes about what one will do for love within the limited runtime, and with such an abrupt end, I’m very intrigued in seeing if he fills out the rest of this well-told tale. PAIGE Strange Way of Life is a melodramatic queer western that feels like a cologne commercial that’s trying to rip off Ang Lee’s Brokeback Mountain . While the performances from Ethan Hawke and Pedro Pascal are very nuanced and engaging, the true issue with this short film is that it tries to say too much in such a short amount of time. It would have benefited greatly if it was a feature, and to be honest, one of the few things that saved it from being a total miss was Pedro Pascal's bare ass. This film was reviewed by Nick and Paige as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2023 Toronto International Film Festival and the 2023 New York Film Festival, respectively.

THE BOYS IN THE BOAT Starring: Joel Edgerton, Callum Turner, Peter Guinness, Sam Strike, Luke Slattery, Hadley Robinson, Jack Mulhern, Thomas Elms, and James Wolk Director: George Clooney PRESTON I’m an unashamed lover of underdog sports stories, movies based on true events, and movies based on books. Check, check, and check. The Boys in the Boat is quite a successful film translation by director George Clooney, even if the written form is more capable of developing characters and telling a satisfyingly complete tale. The only distracting note was an odd focus on the oar lock clamps, which had me predicting inevitable disaster, but definitely added to the racing scenes’ intensity. Even so, this is simply a feel-good sports drama with steady pacing that allows for an easily enjoyable ride. ADRIANO I don't know what it is with George Clooney choosing to direct only the most forgettable scripts imaginable, but here we are again with The Boys in the Boat . The movie plays it aggressively by the numbers in terms of its presentation and its writing, and it’s as predictable as can be to a comedic degree. Some of the writing is particularly nonsensical too, especially towards the end. On top of that, even as an underdog story, I didn't feel anything . Clooney has better directing chops than this, and this is just another embarrassment for the director.

ABIGAIL Starring: Melissa Barrera, Dan Stevens, Alisha Weir, William Catlett, Kathryn Newton, Kevin Durand, Angus Cloud, and Giancarlo Esposito Director: Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett ADRIANO A word of advice: it might be best to go into Abigail without the mindset that it's a horror film because the overbearing score and overall tone make the film seem more like a heist thriller, for better and for worse. That said, while some of the rules in the writing are nonsensical and the third act goes too far off the rails, I had way too much fun with Abigail . The entire ensemble works off each other amazingly, and once the shit hits the fan, it's an ultra-gory blast that made me forgive its obvious shortcomings. AMARÚ Sometimes, I wish Giancarlo Esposito just wasn’t in a movie because he’s the sole reason I decided to see Abigail . While I don’t regret watching, it did nothing to sway me towards liking horror. The Radio Silence directorial team brings flashes of Clue and Murder by Death to this horror comedy, but it’s nowhere near funny enough or clever enough to reach those heights. People still make dumb decisions, characters are still cliché, and even though Melissa Barrera, Dan Stevens, and a stand-out Kevin Durand try to bring some nuance, they don’t bring quite enough to say it’s anything more than fine. PAIGE While Abigail may get off to a slow start, once the game of cat and mouse begins, the movie really picks up steam and takes off. It becomes a bloody blast! Directing team Radio Silence succeeds in crafting an excellent blend of horror and comedy with this vampire flick. If you’ve seen the trailers, you know what to expect from the movie, and while it may not reinvent the wheel in any way, it’s an utter delight. This campy gore fest is a hell of a ride, thanks to its charismatic cast, who elevate the story with their performances. KATIE Abigail is a ridiculously fun time that had me both laughing out loud and wincing at the gore. It's unashamedly camp and excessive, and Alisha Weir is amazing in the titular role, moving effortlessly between adorable and menacing. Despite the stale dialogue, the ensemble cast each make the most of their roles and have great chemistry. My only issue is that it's slightly overlong, not knowing when to end its finale. I imagine I would not have been as impressed had I seen the trailer and known the premise, but going in blind made this a bloody and fun surprise. PRESTON Abigail may be a victim of its own trailer, as what would have otherwise been a spine-tingling revelation serves as a mundane step in the plot marching forward. Instead, this gory vampire flick proceeds with a predictable unfolding of events that doesn’t break any known molds. While not self-serious, it still doesn’t come close to the campy cleverness of Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett’s previously directed Ready or Not. One highlight is a dance scene set to the awesomely chilling sounds of Danzig's “Blood and Tears” (I won’t mention the stupidly conflicting effects of the exposure to the sunlight, though…oh, oops). CALEB When Alisha Weir gets to do her thing, Abigail is a blast. The movie is at its best when the tiny vampire queen is running amok, but there just isn’t enough of her doing that. The other cast members dominate the runtime, and they aren’t nearly as entertaining as she is. By the third act, Abigail (Weir) gets sidelined by another, much lamer antagonist, and it results in a convoluted, unsatisfying conclusion that caps off the movie on a low note. I still had a good time with Abigail , but I wish it played to its strengths and let lil’ Abby have a bit more fun.

ARCO Starring: Romy Fay, Natalie Portman, Will Ferrell, America Ferrera, Flea, Mark Ruffalo, and Andy Samberg Director: Ugo Bienvenu ADRIANO Arco breaks no barriers in any sense, either in animation or thematically, but it's another piece of evidence that maintaining a level of genuine care for itself will yield great results. The narrative about finding connection at a young age is nothing new, and the animation clearly takes from Studio Ghibli at times. Still, I couldn't help but feel warmth from the story and look in awe at some of the film's visuals, mixed in with creative world-building and mythology that caught my attention. At some point, Arco’s familiarity just didn't even faze me anymore. AMARÚ Watching the English dub of Arco unfortunately affected my enjoyment of a pretty interesting film as I couldn’t help but wonder if one-third of the key vocal performances (Flea, Will Ferrell, and Andy Samberg’s bumbling brothers) didn’t translate well from their French counterparts. I was more interested in Iris (Romy Fay) and her Earthbound world than the flat titular character (Juliano Krue Valdi), so that trio’s overt cheesiness made it even harder to fully connect to the plot. Luckily, Iris’ family had an intriguing enough story that the less compelling characters didn’t make me lose all interest. BODE Many have dubbed director Ugo Bienvenu’s Arco “France’s answer to Studio Ghibli,” and I can see why. Its art style is as fluid and elegant as some of their best work, there’s a mix of optimism and cynicism in its environmental message that’s characteristic of Hayao Miyazaki himself, and composer Arnaud Toulon’s lush score manages to evoke the great Joe Hisashi without feeling overtly derivative. The elements are there, but it’s lacking when it comes to its storytelling and world-building, which makes it difficult to fully invest in its emotional stakes. Again, I get the acclaim, but for me, it’s only decent. This film was reviewed by Adriano as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2025 Toronto International Film Festival.

ON SWIFT HORSES Starring: Daisy Edgar-Jones, Jacob Elordi, Will Poulter, Diego Calva, and Sasha Calle Director: Daniel Minahan ADRIANO I couldn't have left the theatre faster once On Swift Horses ended. A truly dreadful experience, it may bring up some interesting ideas on sexuality and impulse, but it winds up being dull and shallow, evaporating any intrigue it ever presented. The cast is... decent. Jacob Elordi is clearly the best-in-show, but it gets so lost in itself and so visually ugly that I struggled to fully grasp what the central point of everything was. Some moments felt like they existed only to amp up the drama, but it ended up making me feel nothing. KATIE On Swift Horses tries to tell too many stories for its own good, presenting some compelling ideas around the glossy American dream juxtaposed with the pressure to conform through oddly convoluted and interweaving narratives that don’t allow it to dig beyond the surface. As such, characters all feel slightly underdeveloped, especially the relationship between Julius (Jacob Elordi) and Muriel (Daisy Edgar-Jones) that the film is essentially built around, which wastes the talents of a stellar cast. Although the 1950s aesthetics are gorgeous and it's shot beautifully, On Swift Horses is a bland and forgettable drama. PAIGE On Swift Horses is a slow burn that does not leave me yearning for love. To be quite honest, it depicts one of the weakest love stories I’ve ever witnessed on screen. Despite decent performances from Jacob Elordi and Daisy Edgar-Jones, the supporting cast (Sasha Calle, Diego Calva, and Will Poulter) are completely underused. The script attempts to deliver a messy and unconventional take on longing for romance, but it falls flat due to the dull screenplay. Its story presents what should have been a hot and heavy whirlwind tale of love and desire, but ends up being a shallow and underwritten story that doesn’t dive deep enough into its themes. This film was reviewed by Adriano as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2024 Toronto International Film Festival.

BARDO: FALSE CHRONICLE OF A HANDFUL OF TRUTHS Starring: Daniel Giménez Cacho and Griselda Siciliani Director: Alejandro González Iñárritu JACOB Despite some occasionally breathtaking photography and one or two genuinely stunning set-pieces from a pure difficulty perspective, Bardo seems to take every trick in director Alejandro González Iñárritu’s playbook and amplify them to their worst outcomes. It’s not that this surrealist examination of Iñárritu’s obsessions is a complete disaster, but nearly everything that has worked for him before doesn’t work here. The ultra-wide lensing is more distracting than immersive, the surrealism itself feels forced rather than intriguing, and at the end of the day, it feels as though the whole exercise is a pretentious way of saying “critics just don’t understand my art.” ADRIANO Bardo opens with some promise. I didn’t know what was happening, yet I still loved it. However, as the film continues, it starts to make less and less sense. Co-writer/director Alejandro G. Iñárritu fills the film with jaw-dropping cinematography and themes of identity and multiculturalism, but those highlights are muddled in a plot that borders on self-indulgence and meta pretentiousness that adds nothing substantive. I never felt attached to the lead, and there is so much weirdness that I couldn’t make out the meaning. Bardo is not the best effort from a director whose work I generally love. JOSEPH There are some beautiful shots to be found, but Bardo mostly feels like an attempt to make us all feel stupid. It wants to say so much, but it also is determined to make sure to state that it’s smarter than you, even going so far as to criticize itself around the halfway point. It’s a nonsensical odyssey attempting to be surrealistic cinema, and it has cemented the idea that I may just not be a fan of Alejandro G. Iñárritu’s films. It’s the definition of pretentious. QUENTIN Upon finishing the film, I finally understood what director Alejandro G. Iñárritu was doing. However, it’s a long and weird 159-minute journey to get there (a journey made to feel longer because of all the subtitles). So, by the time I “got it,” I didn’t care much anymore. Often though, a scene was so beautifully shot or a sequence so excellently captured that you remember why Iñárritu is so revered as a director. He just misses the mark here, leaning a tad too far into self-indulgence as he addresses (presumably) his personal conflict with multiculturalism. As a white dude, it was hard for me to relate.

NUTCRACKERS Starring: Ben Stiller, Homer Janson, Ulysses Janson, Arlo Janson, Atlas Janson, Linda Cardellini, and Toby Huss Director: David Gordon Green NICK You've seen this story before: the reluctant father figure who comes into guardianship only to re-evaluate his life. In fact, story aside, Nutcrackers feels like a film from a bygone era, the mid ‘90s to early 2000s boom of family films. What gives it a slight edge are the child performers (all real-life siblings). They are quite good, bringing an authenticity that helps the film land emotionally. It's incredibly predictable and fairly unoriginal, but at the very least, it's a feel-good film that'll bring a smile to your face. You could do worse. KATIE Nutcrackers is disappointingly devoid of Christmas joy. The cliché and predictable plot follows character archetypes that everyone will recognise, but I actually didn’t have an issue with that. In fact, I love a reliably comforting family comedy. The problem is it's hollow, and although the child cast is quite endearing, they are all underwritten. Meanwhile, Ben Stiller’s character, Mike, doesn’t form enough of a bond with them for the emotional impact to hit. It looks nice, with pretty shots of the small town and nostalgia-tinged scenes of the brothers playing outside, but that's about it. PAIGE Nutcrackers may be one of the most cliché and run-of-the-mill Christmas dramedies I’ve seen in a while. Unfortunately for its director, David Gordon Green, he’s had more misses than hits lately, and this falls in the miss category. Instead of trying to get you emotionally attached to the characters, the film asks its audience to fill in the emotional beats, which doesn't help the already shoddy narrative. Despite there being some endearing moments in this family holiday film, it won't make you laugh or pull at your heartstrings. Nutcrackers is simply forgettable, and I don’t foresee it being on my holiday rewatch list. This film was reviewed by Nick as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2024 Toronto International Film Festival.

CHEVALIER Starring: Kelvin Harrison Jr., Samara Weaving, Lucy Boynton, Ronke Adekoluejo, Marton Csokas, Sian Clifford, Minnie Driver, and Alex Fitzalan Director: Stephen Williams ADRIANO Chevalier can often feel familiar in its approach, but it’s such a fascinating true story, told with such conviction and power, that I couldn’t help but revel at it. The aesthetic is something to behold, with its production and costume design going beyond just a typical period piece. There is genuine flair and pizzazz to be found here. Samara Weaving is delightful, and Kelvin Harrison Jr. soars with his performance as Joseph Bologne. He displays so much charm and humanity into this forgotten figure. A more nuanced look at Bologne’s life would have been nice, but it’s still a riveting tale, nonetheless. AMARÚ The opening of Chevalier plays like a rap battle, and it’s with that sort of relentlessness in which Kelvin Harrison Jr. attacks the title role. His unabating strength and insatiable charm is matched by director Stephen Williams’ use of tracking shots personably focused on foreground characters. This pushes an unwavering pace that initially highlights heavy-handed racial themes and an otherwise magnificent Samara Weaving’s spotty accent. But as these flaws are evened out further into the fierce narrative, the juxtaposition of Harrison and Williams’ brute force with touching points of tender subtext made for a thrilling retelling of lesser known portions of world history. JACOB For all of its posturing regarding how legendary Joseph Bologne was as a classical composer and virtuoso violinist, it is a bit disappointing that Chevalier only seems to want to play the most basic notes of his story. Don’t get me wrong, the movie works overall, standing squarely on the strength of Kelvin Harrison Jr.’s lead performance, but it also moves through most of the story without actually exploring the nuances of various situations, instead simply presenting them as being. That said, the first and last five minutes of the film are equally thrilling, and the music itself is beautiful. This film was reviewed by Adriano as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2022 Toronto International Film Festival.

THE HARDER THEY FALL Starring: Jonathan Majors, Idris Elba, Zazie Beetz, Regina King, LaKeith Stanfield, Delroy Lindo, Edi Gathegi, RJ Cyler, Danielle Deadwyler, and Deon Cole Director: Jeymes Samuel AMARÚ The Harder They Fall is my kind of western, featuring the coolest characters played by the coolest performers saying the coolest things over the coolest score. First-time director Jeymes Samuel makes sure to capture everything as epically as possible and does not waste a shot. Although every person on screen shines bright, it's Jonathan Majors who continues to prove how, even amongst legends like Regina King, Delroy Lindo, and Idris Elba, he will be top billed for decades to come. I promise this will be, hands-down, one of the most bad-ass movies you've watched in years. QUENTIN I recently asked a friend that I just made up for this review, "What was the last great western?" In The Harder They Fall , Netflix has delivered the answer. The performances are stellar across the board, though Jonathan Majors and LaKeith Stanfield are especially great, and the confident direction of Jeymes Samuel (in his feature debut, no less) is astounding. He's clearly influenced by Quentin Tarantino, but it feels much fresher, dripping with the "Black swagger" that Tarantino is constantly trying to capture. It admittedly drags slightly in the middle, but Samuel has crafted one of the year's best movies. JACOB The first third of director Jeymes Samuel’s The Harder They Fall takes a while to find its balance. Ironically, the more stylized portions - the "Netflix movie" segments - are its less successful elements. However, once the story is established and the castmates are all together, it morphs into something that works, relying (to a fault) on good performances and entertaining, well-staged action sequences. Idris Elba and Jonathan Majors are dynamite, especially when sharing the screen, as are LaKeith Stanfield and Delroy Lindo. It all amounts to a pretty fun western, even if the sequel-bait ending did leave me a little annoyed. ADRIANO Do you want to have a good time watching a movie? If so, I can't recommend The Harder They Fall enough, an entertaining-as all-hell spaghetti western from first time feature director Jeymes Samuel. It doesn't veer too far from the tropes of the genre, but it has the style and dialogue of something much fresher. The large ensemble does not disappoint, with such amazing performances that it's hard to pick a true standout. It may not rank among 2021's best, but it's definitely some of the most fun I've had with a movie this year. NICK Director Jeymes Samuel kills it in his directorial debut with this film that has shades of Quentin Tarantino, but also stands out as its own thing. It’s violent, vibrant, and vindictive. It also boasts a stacked cast. Jonathan Majors gives a career best performance, solidifying his promise as a leading man, while LaKeith Stanfield oozes cool as the villainous Cherokee Bill. Not to mention Zazie Beetz, Regina King, and many more all adding to this beautiful chaos. The Harder They Fall is dripping with swagger at every point. Don’t let this one get by you.

C'MON C'MON Starring: Joaquin Phoenix, Woody Norman, Gaby Hoffman, and Scoot McNairy Director: Mike Mills NICK Nothing about C’mon C’mon feels like fiction. At times, it’s like a documentary, but it mostly feels like you’re watching people live their lives. It’s earnest, honest, and surprisingly philosophical. That said, its combination of slow pacing and the black and white colour palette hold it back from some much needed vibrance. Overall, this will be a polarizing film, as I can see people loving it and I can see people frustrated by it. However, the performances by Gaby Hoffman, Woody Norman, and Joaquin Phoenix (in the most natural showing of his career) were enough to keep me engaged throughout. JACOB The enveloping warmth of C’mon C’mon cannot be overstated. Writer/director Mike Mills’ film is one of the year’s very best, imbued with philosophical curiosity, wonder, and deeply human vulnerability. Shot in gorgeous, crisp black and white, it wraps viewers in a warm hug and fills them with meaningful contemplation through terrific performances and a mesmerizing musical score. Joaquin Phoenix is as natural as he has ever been, while Gaby Hoffman is an instant favorite; however, it’s Woody Norman that steals the show, turning in maybe the best child performance I’ve seen in the last decade. ADRIANO C’mon C’mon is a beautiful film that simply kept me smiling throughout the vast majority of its runtime, and it might be writer/director Mike Mills’ best movie to date. It is very well shot (even if I don’t fully understand why it was shot in black and white), and Joaquin Phoenix is amazing as usual. However, newcomer Woody Norman really steals the show, and the bond between him and Phoenix, paired with Mills’ soulful look at life, is easily what makes this movie as sweet as it is. I would seriously recommend this movie to anybody.