Search Results

HUMANIST VAMPIRE SEEKING CONSENTING SUICIDAL PERSON Starring: Sara Montpetit, Félix-Antoine Bénard, and Noémie O'Farrell Director: Ariane Louis-Seize QUENTIN When people talk about discovering hidden gems at film festivals, Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person is exactly what they are talking about. The most authentically indie-feeling movie at Venice Film Festival last year, Humanist Vampire puts a modern spin on vampire mythology to deliver a fresh, funny, and darkly sweet coming-of-age story that touches on familial pressure, adolescent expectations, teen depression, and young love. In the Q&A that followed my screening, director Ariane Louis-Seize (who won the GdA Director’s Award at Venice) referenced Let the Right One In and Lady Bird as inspirations, and I can’t sum it up any better than that. NICK Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person is a new take on a vampire subgenre that is difficult to tackle. This independent feature out of Québec has the gothic whimsy of The Addams Family , plus a ton of heart behind its premise. Sara Montpetit as Sasha gives an engaging performance, particularly excelling in her expression work, maintaining engagement without dialogue. Together, her and Félix-Antoine Bénard (Paul) make for an entertainingly quirky duo. This may not be on a lot of people’s radars, but hopefully, once some good word-of-mouth comes out from the festival circuit, it will rightly be seen by more. PAIGE Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person is a witty and gothic-like coming-of-age tale that is quite delightful. This unique twist on vampire lore is definitely something to sink your fangs into, thanks to its brooding atmosphere, the dry sense of humor, and solid performances from its two leads. It may not be a masterpiece due to its predictability, but writer/director Ariane Louis-Seize manages to create a new angle on this subgenre while wonderfully capturing the essence of an awkward teenage romance. This film was reviewed by Quentin, Nick, and Paige as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2023 Venice International Film Festival, the 2023 Toronto International Film Festival, and Make Believe Seattle 2024 respectively.

FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY'S Starring: Josh Hutcherson, Elizabeth Lail, Piper Rubio, Mary Stuart Masterson, and Matthew Lillard Director: Emma Tammi PAIGE Holy moly is Five Nights at Freddy’s HORRENDOUS. It’s narratively pushed by a half-assed storyline about childhood trauma that it never fully commits to, and it seems to debate with itself as to whether it wants to be taken somewhat seriously as a “horror” film or go all-in on the campiness of everything. It’s a shame, too, because, honestly, somewhere in there is a good movie, but with such a tame and muddled script littered with tonal inconsistencies and story issues, it prevents it from being anything close to enjoyable. So, I’ll leave it at this…Five Nights At Freddy's is four nights too many. ADRIANO Five Nights at Freddy's is for fans of the game and nobody else. Everyone else must suffer through a dull, tension-less horror film that baffles at every turn. The film's reliance on fan service is shameless, and fans will argue that the bizarre plotting and backstory are all "the lore," but as a non-fan, I couldn't make sense of it. And that's before even mentioning the horrific editing and one of the craziest tonal shifts I can remember. Nothing even really happens for four of the five nights. If you like the games, have fun. Everyone else, steer clear. CALEB On paper, a horror movie about murderous Chuck-E-Cheese-style animatronics is a fun idea, but Five Nights at Freddy’s is held back by its own source material. Too much of the runtime is spent exploring lore from the video game, and it takes time away from the fun robots. Admittedly, they don’t actually look that great, but whenever they’re on screen, the movie is at least somewhat entertaining. If the droves of screeching 14-year-olds in my theater were any indication, I’d bet this one gets a sequel, so next time, let’s have more focus on the killer animatronics and less on Nebraska. KATIE Five Nights at Freddy’s completely lacked any bite. It should have been fun, cheesy, excessive, and gory. Instead, it was bland, boring, and failed to commit to the horror element of the source material, suffering as a result. As someone who is unfamiliar with the video games, the barrage of references were lost on me, and I was left pointlessly waiting for something, anything, interesting to happen. The film’s focus on the ‘lore’ of the games isolates anyone who isn't in the know, and consequently is full of confusing tonal shifts, tedious plotting, and unconvincing performances. PHILL Five Nights at Freddy’s is convoluted and overlong (despite only running at 110 minutes), and it’s truly scary how boring it is. It’s a mighty achievement for Blumhouse to take such a basic concept and fumble it as much as they have. Hindered by its lack of an R-rating, Five Nights at Freddy’s is too tame and timid, promising a payoff that never truly arrives in any remotely satisfying way. Given a lower budget and a grittier/gorier atmosphere, this film could have been something worthwhile. Instead, it relies solely on jump scares that don't even raise a heartbeat.

RANDOM ACTS OF VIOLENCE Starring: Jay Baruchel, Jesse Williams, Jordana Brewster, Niamh Wilson, and Simon Northwood Director: Jay Baruchel NICK Peter Farrelly, Adam McKay, and Todd Phillips are just a few examples of comedy directors that have successfully jumped genres. We can now add Jay Baruchel to that list. Baruchel balances vintage horror tropes and fresh ideas to create an entertaining yet thought-provoking film that looks at the effect of gratuitous violence in the media. It doesn’t want you to take pride in its disturbing killings, but to simply feel them. It's a unique approach and one of many ways Random Acts of Violence breathes new life into the slasher genre. This one is sure to become a cult classic. QUENTIN There is probably a worthwhile commentary on society's obsession with true crime somewhere in Random Acts of Violence , but it's buried under a lot of garbage. 1. The protagonists are underdeveloped and unlikeable. 2. The villain, who lacks a tangible motive until a semi-predictable one is lazily tacked on, isn't frightening. 3. The kill scenes, while gory, aren't creative. Director Jay Baruchel tries so hard for a grindhouse auteur aesthetic that it's off-putting, then he couples it with fairly unoriginal slasher movie tropes that completely lack tension. Believe it or not, I actually love horror movies... Just not this one.

BOY KILLS WORLD Starring: Bill Skarsgård, H. Jon Benjamin, Jessica Rothe, Michelle Dockery, Brett Gelman, Isaiah Mustafa, Andrew Koji, Famke Janssen, Sharlto Copley, Yayan Ruhian, and Quinn Copeland Director: Moritz Mohr QUENTIN In the crowded action revenge genre, it doesn’t take much to succeed. The plots are almost always the same, so you only need charismatic characters, well-choreographed fight scenes, and exciting action sequences to entertain. Sadly, Boy Kills World didn’t get the memo. I admit there are few solid chuckles to be had, particularly a running joke about the deaf and mute Boy (Bill Skarsgård) being unable to read another character’s lips, but they aren’t enough to carry the film through its bloated runtime, mundanity, or dumbass twist. You’re better off rewatching John Wick . Or Monkey Man . Or Silent Night . Or…well, you get the idea. NICK Boy Kills World is a lot like a video game because the action scenes are bombastic and clearly inspired by that world. Bill Skarsgård makes for a dynamic lead despite any of his own dialogue thanks to his facial expressions and combat skills. I actually wish he had done the internal monologue over H. Jon Benjamin (the way it was originally screened at TIFF) as Benjamin provides too much disconnect. All in all, I liked this more than most of the John Wick -style films, probably because it leans heavier into the comedy side of things. It’s just a good-ass time. AMARÚ The second Bob from Bob’s Burgers (H. Jon Benjamin) starts narrating Boy Kills World , I knew what to expect: an utterly ridiculous time that rides the line between satirical and stupid. Then I saw the “Old Spice Man Your Man Could Smell Like” (Isaiah Mustafa) leading the film’s best running bit, and from that point on, I said fuck it. The action (and paired soundtrack) is cool, Bill Skarsgård’s gamut of expressions fit perfectly, and supporting actors like Mustafa and Sharlto Copley know exactly how to elevate this kind of stupidity. Yayan Ruhian alone is worth the crazy, and I’m here for it.

MISSION KANDAHAR Starring: Gerard Butler, Navid Negahban, Ali Fazal, and Bahador Foladi Director: Ric Roman Waugh JACOB Although it’s admirable that Mission Kandahar has more on its mind than most Gerard Butler flicks – chiefly, the complex consequences of the U.S.’s departure from Afghanistan – it doesn’t quite have the necessary sophistication to navigate that conversation. Anyone expecting an action-packed ride likely will be disappointed, but what’s more disheartening to me is how good the film could have been with a few more passes at the script. Butler remains as watchable as ever, and Ric Roman Waugh seems a fitting director for his particular brand of hero, but this one just didn’t work…at least not like Greenland did. NICK I really enjoyed director Ric Roman Waugh and Gerard Butler's last team-up, Greenland , but Mission Kandahar can only be described as a disappointing follow-up. Promoted as an action film, it's not particularly exciting. In fact, it focuses a lot more on its meandering dialogue while being shot in increasingly dark spaces. Honestly, I'm all for realism, but there are points where it felt like I was just listening to a podcast. Unfortunately, Mission Kandahar wasn’t able to hold my attention, but I'm still hopeful that Butler and Waugh’s next offering, Greenland: Migration , can right the ship.

BLACKBERRY Starring: Jay Baruchel, Glenn Howerton, Matt Johnson, Cary Elwes, and Saul Rubinek Director: Matt Johnson NICK The downfall of BlackBerry is a story I knew a fair bit about, but the rise was a little less on my radar. While this film luckily encompasses the entire thing, it works against the story a bit as interesting details are set aside in favour of dramatic time jumps, which can cause some whiplash. Where this film shines, however, is the performance of Glenn Howerton as Jim Balsillie. He is a powerhouse on screen, and at his best when coming completely unhinged, making the perfect counter to Jay Baruchel's subdued Mike Lazaridis. The two of them carry this to being quite the entertaining film. QUENTIN I love a good rise-and-fall corporate story, something BlackBerry certainly delivers. Tone-wise, it nimbly bounces between Silicon Valley and The Social Network , though the "rise" arc is much stronger than that of the "fall," which is a tad rushed. However, I can’t say enough about the casting. Glenn Howerton is perfect as a hot-headed corporate shark, bringing the same deep-seated rage he has demonstrated on It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia for 15 seasons, and Jay Baruchel’s natural awkwardness serves his nerdy, “tech guy” character well. It’s not Oscar-worthy, but I wouldn’t be surprised if BlackBerry eventually wins some smaller awards down the line. ADRIANO BlackBerry is a rise-and-fall true story that fascinated and entertained me, yet its lasting impact likely is minimal. The mix of The Social Network , The Big Short , and Silicon Valley vibes work in creating an electric tone that made me laugh, and the ensemble is great, especially a towering performance from Glenn Howerton that is truly unforgettable. However, while the pieces are there, it feels like it’s missing something. Perhaps if we were given a better look at our characters and what drives them, it would have elevated BlackBerry to the level of biopic it aspires to be, but it remains a fun time nonetheless. PAIGE BlackBerry is one of those "based on a true story" films that you watch and quickly forget about. Though it is an interesting rise-and-fall story that benefits from director’s Matt Johnson's honest indie approach, the film begins to lose its charm in the second half. It goes down a predictably conventional route that feels as dated as the actual BlackBerry phone. That said, it features some really enjoyable stuff too, especially Jay Baruchel and Glenn Howerton giving performances that feel different and unhinged, respectively. This film was reviewed by Quentin as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2023 Berlinale International Film Festival.

THE RITUAL Starring: Al Pacino, Dan Stevens, Abigail Cowen, Ashley Greene, Patricia Heaton, and Patrick Fabian Director: David Midell KATIE The Ritual is, by and large, a typical exorcism film, full of tropes and familiar beats. The first half is actually quite strong, with jump scares and scary visuals that are effective. However, it then falls flat, and the repetitive plot begins to feel monotonous. I also don’t think the handheld camera style added to the story; if anything, it's sometimes distracting and feels cheap. Whenever it does work, it's because of the performances. I came for Pacino (Father Riesinger) and Dan Stevens (Father Steiger), but stayed for Abigail Cowen (Emma Schmidt) and Ashley Greene (Sister Rose). NICK Dan Stevens is one of those actors who always seems to be doing something interesting regardless of the project he’s in. Unfortunately, when it comes to The Ritual , there is nothing interesting here. From the retreaded story beats, to the bland writing and performances, to some of the worst cinematography I’ve seen in a theatrical release in some time, there’s nothing to salvage. I think director David Midell was aiming for something hyper-realistic, but what he wound up with was one of the dullest depictions of possession I’ve seen on screen. A truly painful 98 minutes to get through.

BARK Starring: Michael Weston and A.J. Buckley Director: Marc Schölermann This film has been reviewed by Quentin and Nick as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of Fantastic Fest 2023. QUENTIN As a low-budget, indie two-hander, Bark does a terrific job for most of its runtime. The slow-burn mystery keeps you on the hook as you try to determine who both the man on the tree (Michael Weston) and The Outdoorsman (A.J. Buckley) truly are, as well as how these two men have come to this point. That said, the ending comes completely out of left field. Yes, all is explained, but the reveal is never even hinted at beforehand, so it just arrives with a bit of an “oh…that’s why?” thud. Also, aside from being underwhelming, some people will just find the ending hard to stomach. NICK Bark is an interesting endeavor. The opening 20 minutes could stand alone as a satisfying short film, while everything that follows is basically a stage play on screen. There are two characters, one location, and a whole bunch of dialogue. It’s performed admirably by Michael Weston and A.J. Buckley, but it somehow manages to both meander and rush to a conclusion. The most frustrating part is that the finale is actually well-thought out (and emotionally affecting), but it isn’t given the time needed to land as well as it could have. Still, that reveal will stick with me for a bit.

BAD BOYS: RIDE OR DIE Starring: Will Smith, Martin Lawrence, Jacob Scipio, Vanessa Hudgens, Alexander Ludwig, Paola Nuñez, Eric Dane, Ioan Gruffudd, Joe Pantoliano, and Rhea Seehorn Directors: Adil El Arbi and Bilall Fallah AMARÚ Bad Boys: Ride or Die really should’ve been called Bad Boys 4 Life because it’s everything I feared the previous entry was going to be. Whereas directors Adil & Bilall previously balanced Michael Bay’s grandeur with well-shot stunt choreography, surprising character development, and in-depth storytelling, Ride or Die is paper-thin predictable with chopped-to-hell, over-stylized action set pieces. Will Smith and Martin Lawrence are still a dynamic pair, so there’s fun to be had, especially one scene that will go down as a franchise best. Unfortunately, this entry executes that patented entertainment at twice the speed with half the payoff; that, sadly, doesn’t compare. QUENTIN Bad Boys: Ride or Die isn’t awful, but it’s like someone ran a Bad Boys script through a Mission: Impossible and Fast & Furious script polisher, then filmed it with overly stylized but oddly lifeless direction through half of a John Wick Instagram filter. It even out-Bays notoriously bombastic (and franchise-starting) director Michael Bay at parts. Will Smith and Martin Lawrence still have nice chemistry, and there are a few nostalgic callbacks, from cameos to certain camera angles, but….ehhh. Amusing, but never funny; actiony, but never exciting - this is about what I expected of the last one, so I was just one movie too early.

SPENCER Starring: Kristen Stewart, Timothy Spall, Jack Nielen, Freddie Spry, Jack Farthing, Sean Harris, Stella Gonet, Richard Sammel, Elizabeth Berrington, Lore Stefanek, Amy Manson, and Sally Hawkins Director: Pablo Larraín JACOB At first, Pablo Larraín's Spencer seems cold and harsh in a manner that prevents one from becoming emotionally invested, but as one realizes where the film is headed, the deliberateness of that choice becomes clear. As much as this is a film about Diana Spencer (Kristen Stewart), it’s also about cages, the lives they suffocate, and what can flourish outside of them. Stewart has never been better, with her performance surely to be an Oscar winner, and the design work is absolutely stellar. Jonny Greenwood's jazz-infused score is another awards-caliber success as well. ADRIANO Spencer has yet to leave my subconscious and I doubt it will for some time, as the movie takes an interesting look at Princess Diana (Kristen Stewart) in ways that aren’t even slightly conventional. Stewart has never been better, giving a stunning and thoroughly heartbreaking performance, while Pablo Larraín's breathtaking direction simmers through nearly every frame. The incredible production values and cinematography blew me away, and Jonny Greenwood's haunting score really sets the tone. This film, easily one of the year’s best, ultimately builds to an incredibly satisfying ending that left me smiling as I left the theatre. QUENTIN Spencer checks nearly all the boxes for an Oscar contender: An artsy take on a (generally) true story about a famous figure starring a talented young actress who has yet to elevate from “movies” to “films.” And, you know, director Pablo Larraín and star (and likely Oscar winner) Kristen Stewart absolutely understood the assignment. They kill it. That said, I didn’t enjoy the experience. Between the slower parts and the random flights-of-fancy, it portrays Princess Di (Stewart) as somewhat crazy, making it hard to invest in her. I definitely respect the craft of Spencer , but I didn’t like the movie.

CONCLAVE Starring: Ralph Fiennes, Stanley Tucci, John Lithgow, Lucian Msamati, Isabella Rossellini, Sergio Castellitto, and Carlos Diehz Director: Edward Berger NICK I'm not particularly religious, so the concept of the conclave was foreign to me. That said, director Edward Berger instantly sucked me into this process and the tension surrounding the decision. This is high-concept drama told by highly acclaimed actors. The always reliable Ralph Fiennes, in particular, gives one of the best performances of his career, but it's the sum of Conclave 's parts that truly makes it shine. Whether it's the sound design and score, the beautiful yet simplistic visuals, or the overall tone of the film, it all amounts to a well-oiled machine I could have spent another hour with. ADRIANO Conclave is so much goofier than you'd expect from a movie about religion, and I say that complimentary. Featuring a stirring performance from Ralph Fiennes, Conclave is sabotage, conspiracy, twists, and shock at almost every turn. All of it is natural, too, never for the sake of a cheap rug pull, but instead to elevate a high-stakes thriller that had me second guessing and feeling tense throughout. The ending could divide audiences, but I thought it was a perfect cap to a film about how religious institutions desperately need to evolve. A well-crafted thrill ride of a film. QUENTIN Conclave is amongst my most overhyped movies of the year (I blame Nick). That’s not to say it’s bad, but at no point did I find the story gripping or thrilling, which is kind of the point of a “conspiracy thriller,” no? Granted, it boasts terrific performances and is handsomely made, but the characters are so underdeveloped that the twists and turns (including a silly final reveal) never hit as hard as seemingly intended. I genuinely didn’t care who became Pope, and a movie like this requires the audience to take a side to work effectively. Conclave is decent, I suppose, but a disappointment, nonetheless. KATIE Conclave is a ridiculously entertaining and suspenseful film consisting of little more than people talking in rooms, which is why it's so impressive. Even as someone with a Catholic background, I’ve never felt invested in the election of the next pope, but Conclave is immediately gripping, plunging you into a process filled with intricate drama and a mounting sense of tension that’s felt in every line of dialogue. It’s also sharply funny in the way it juxtaposes modernity with the absurd rigidity of Catholic tradition, and boasts a career-best performance from Ralph Fiennes. AMARÚ Please excuse the blasphemy on this particular review, but holy shit, because you can feel the tension from the first note of composer Volker Bertelmann’s violins and the immediacy of director Edward Berger’s striking images. Conclave is a powder keg of politics and power in papacy, delivering a conspiring mystery worthy of our favorite political thrillers. Oscars will be touted for the many brilliant acting performances here, but the spotlight belongs to Carlos Diehz, whose mere presence is a lightning bolt piercing through this monstrous ensemble. Conclave , by its final frame, is a potent crescendo whose gradual momentum explodes to a fantastically satisfying conclusion. PAIGE Conclave piques the interest of the viewer as a behind-the-scenes political thriller focusing on the oldest religious organization in the world, one with perhaps the most secretive and exclusive leaderships within that milieu. Director Edward Berger leans into the most mysterious components of the rites, traditions, and disciplines that influence so much of the global population. Political jockeying is highlighted as we stumble into each new revelation before the last shocking twist. My only complaint is that the plotline that drives us forward to the edge of our seats leaves us with a contemplative, but misleading and disappointing conclusion. This political thriller is a behind-the-scenes look at the corruption within the Catholic Church, but it unfortunately falls short of the excitement its compelling premise promises. That said, from a technical standpoint, Conclave is excellently crafted by Edward Berger and it’s well acted. It's just that the story isn’t as engrossing as I had hoped, primarily because the characters are so underdeveloped. The slow pacing also doesn’t do the film's reveals any justice, as they all feel too toned down. The story needed more tension and buildup to make this promising plot truly work. This film was reviewed by Quentin, Nick, Adriano, and Katie as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2024 Zurich Film Festival, 2024 Toronto International Film Festival, and 2024 BFI London Film Festival respectively.

SHE SAID Starring: Zoe Kazan, Carey Mulligan, Samantha Morton, Tom Pelphrey, Jennifer Ehle, Andre Braugher, Patricia Clarkson, Ashley Judd, Elle Graham, Adam Shapiro, and Anastasia Barzee Director: Maria Schrader JACOB The greatest strengths of She Said are those most baked into the story, namely the actual investigative elements of the infamous Harvey Weinstein case and the journalistic sequences as the article is being put together at the New York Times offices. It also boasts some stellar performances, solid writing, and a subtly great score. However, it’s not without faults, one of those being a fairly wonky editing structure that makes the first few minutes feel jumbled. The larger conflicts are there, but absent is the focus on the protagonists’ personal conflicts that made Spotlight – this film’ closest counterpart – so convicting. QUENTIN I’m a sucker for journalism movies, and while She Said isn’t one of the better ones I’ve seen, it’s good enough to satisfy cravings for a genre that doesn’t have near enough offerings. The film features mostly decent performances (Zoe Kazan struggles) and some of the worst editing I have ever seen, but what matters is the story. Though a little dry, it manages to honor Harvey Weinstein’s victims and the difficulty of their situations with a quiet respect (the lone exception is the Ashley Judd of it all, which comes off as self-aggrandizing). Overall, it’s a worthy watch, even if it doesn’t make waves. ADRIANO She Said is a movie that can simply coast on its powerful and incredible true story, which is why I find it very admirable just how matter-of-fact this film is. There is no overdramatizing, and while at times that can feel a little dry in its approach, it allowed the story to speak for itself. Carey Mulligan and Zoe Kazan are both great, and although I wish we learned more about them, I think they were written with the respect they’re owed. This was a truly effective movie that did both the subjects and victims justice. This film was reviewed by Jacob as part of Bitesize Breakdown's coverage of the 2022 New York Film Festival.