THE RETIREMENT PLAN
Starring: Nicolas Cage, Ron Perlman, Thalia Campbell, Ashley Greene Khoury, Jackie Earle Haley, Ernie Hudson, Joel David Moore, Grace Byers, Lynn Whitfield, and Rick Fox
Director: Tim Brown
To be perfectly blunt, as a tip-to-tail movie, The Retirement Plan is not great. Most of the acting is incredibly wooden, the editing is janky, the Guy Ritchie-esque character title cards are unnecessary, and it has some of the most obvious foreshadowing I’ve ever seen. That said, Nic Cage as a former badass turned beach bum who is forced to be a badass again, as well as the dynamic between Ron Perlman and Thalia Campbell, give it spurts of watchability. If, like me, you’re a Cage Completist, he has far worse films out there, but this one definitely harkens back to the straight-to-DVD era.
The Retirement Plan is a pretty difficult watch, especially whenever Nicolas Cage isn’t on screen. The filmmaking on display here is extremely cheap and amateurish, which is a shame because the script isn’t all that bad. The writing is definitely derivative, but in better hands, I think it could’ve made for a fairly enjoyable Guy Ritchie rip-off. Unfortunately, the film-school-level editing and cinematography put a damper on the whole affair, which really kept me from appreciating the narrative. Thankfully, at the very least, Nicolas Cage gives a performance that’s entertaining enough to somewhat salvage the experience.